So after a few turbulent (to say the least!) months I've arrived in Berlin for the foreseeable future. As is fairly typical of me, I didn't plan this move too much and instead just went off of gut instinct - it's done me well so far and, to quote my dad, 'you should never waste a good crisis.' The crisis certainly would have been wasted had I stayed in London, the city I've been telling myself and everyone I'm trying to get out of for the past two years.
Fortunately I had the offer of a place to stay while I get myself on my feet, which for the moment involves looking for some work and somewhere to live.
I read a quote from Milan Kundera's The Joke recently which resonated with me, "I had several faces because I was young and didn't know who I was or wanted to be." For me personally at the moment the main dilemma revolves around work. My interests span a broad category which brings some broad questions. How do I make my life meaningful for myself and others? How do I make my life meaningful for myself and others and get paid?
The key, I think, is reconciling all your faces - including the ones that seem somewhat contradictory. In the 'about' section of this blog I wrote about all the different masks I've worn on my life journey so far, writing about food, fashion, fitness, society, art, culture... you name it. I have this unshakeable and annoying tendency to want to commit myself wholly to one thing or the other.
Which brings me to my next point. Before heading to Berlin I spent five days in Prague for the Beyond Psychedelics conference. The conference was fascinating and being surrounded by people so passionate about the cause of furthering psychedelic research and culture was incredibly inspiring. It's not something I've spoken about on here before, but I had an experience on a magic mushroom retreat in Jamaica earlier this year which had a profound effect on the way I think about my life. Mainly, I realised that in order to be more at peace with myself I needed to stop being so preoccupied with the 'being' and get on with the 'doing'. Who cares if I'm a Londoner that loves to spend time in the mountains, a yoga and healthy eating enthusiast who also enjoys going out to bars? A mix of contradictions doesn't an un-whole person make.
Anyway, I'll interrupt this self indulgent stream of consciousness now as I'm about to go and sit in a bar to watch England play Belgium in the World Cup.